AREvista (Third Edition)

The third edition of AREvista has hit the streets of Arenillas this week. For those that can´t get their own copy, we have a digital copy for you to enjoy.

If the photo link doesn´t work, you can find a copy here.


(Editor's note: Due to technical issues, some of the fonts might be modified.)

New fruits

So I saw this fruit in the market the other day.

It looks like the zapote (damn, you probably don't know what that is either).

Anyway, it's called mamey and it's delicious.

You need a knife to cut through the skin and a tube of toothpaste nearby when pictures are taken. Mamey has a pretty big pit, but everything between the pit and the rind is edible. Its flavor reminds me of apricot.

Things crawling on my bathroom door

It's been around for a few days now, long enough that I can start thinking of names. Any ideas?

Either way, I don´t know if it's male or female.

---

I took this picture early in the morning. I walked to the bathroom to poop and saw this frog on the door. I went back for the camera and snapped the above image.

So what happened after?

I had to poop, but there was a frog on the door. I know that it's a frog and that it doesn`t care what I'm doing. But it's uncomfortable for me.

So I went back for my broom to poke him off the door. The thing about the frog is that he was really stuck to the door. So it took some prying before getting him on his way.

I ran into the frog a few days later. This time, I didn't even realize it was the frog until I had already stepped on him/her.

You see, I was walking in the dark between my kitchen and my living room. I saw something roundish on the ground, maybe a piece of garbage. Who knows?

So I stepped on it. As I was stepping down onto it, I realized this wasn't plastic or an insect. Plus, the frog realized the danger it was in as soon as my foot weighed down on him/her. It scampered off.

Then, last Friday night, I had some friends over for dinner and had briefed them about the frog situation. It's not that abnormal for volunteers to talk about their encounters with animals. Actually, it's pretty common. Some talked about run-ins with snakes, angry dogs, etc.

One of my volunteer friends stood up to go to the bathroom and discovered the frog on the wall. When the volunteer went back to poke the frog, it took some preemptive action and pooped on the volunteer's hand.

The most disappointing thing in all of this is that s/he never once ribbitted. (sp?)

Maybe it's mute.

How do you say Roswell in Spanish?

Last week, an interesting story appeared in a local newspaper, "Diario Correo". They typically put all of their stories on their website, but this one must have slipped by the online staff.

¡Que lastima! (What a shande)

I`ll paraphrase for you.

For tomorrow, 20 January 2010, Kill, the alien son of the Yaguana Granda family, is planning to arrive on planet Earth, according to José, who on the night of 7 January 1996 lent his wife's womb to be impregnated by four aliens on the banks of the river.

Prior knowledge

Last 24 November 2009, José told this newspaper in an exclusive interview that 13 years after his encounter with Laxti, Nortu and Sasqui, they had promised to bring his son back 20 January 2009.

The family said that their last contact with the aliens was 3 October 2008 at the same spot where the aliens had abducted his wife.

Yesterday, José said that you have to let what happens happen and that the date might be off because the aliens don't operate on the same calendar system that we do on Earth.

Place

Yaguana still insists upon the exact date and place of the encounter and that he and his wife are preparing for it. In the last three weeks, they have gone back to the place where she was impregnated to prepare themselves and receive energy from the rocks there.

He said he's not joking around and isn't doing this just to gain attention. What he wants is to create a consciousness among intelligent people about the reality in which we are living.

Thirteen years

The parents are happy for the appearance of their son and to receive new messages and assignments from Laxti, Nortu and Sasqui. José always refers to those three as brothers.

Fourteen years have passed since the encounter, ten minutes outside of town. The aliens come form the planet Ecton: Laxti (capt.), Norku (Co-pilot, notice different spelling of name from before) and Sasqui (second co-pilot). Thirteen years ago they took José's wife up into their flying saucer and using a complicated method, impregnated her.

There is a bit more, but I think you get the idea. I know that a few days have passed since the encounter was supposed to take place, but I haven´t heard anything.

A few years ago the dude took a lie detector test and passed. Accordingly, everyone in town believes him.

I think of myself as doing the same thing as José, telling other intelligent people about the reality that we live in (sarcasm). I'll keep you guys posted if I hear anything new. And if something does happen, I see a lot of tourist potential.

It`s kind of like the Wells Fargo Wagon

(If you haven`t voted yet, please help me choose the next book I read by participating in the poll on the right column)



So the MagicSex truck came into the market this morning.

The MagicSex truck is an herbal supplement megastore on wheels that passes through my town every few months. And when it swings by, you would think they are giving it away.

Now, from my experience, Ecuadorians are very susceptible to purchasing from the guy selling nutritional supplements. You see this on the bus, on the street, door-to-door, wherever. Heck, some dude came into our office one day trying to get us to buy some supplement.

But the MagicSex mobile is a different breed. Maybe it's the green and yellow paint job, maybe it's the insane collection of herbal remedies in the trunk, maybe it's the two-megaphone sound system. [Aside: I will attach a megaphone to my car when I get back to the U.S.] Anyway, whatever it is, it is ridiculous. Plus, MagicSex doesn`t just sell MagicSex products.

They carry a full line of supplements that will improve, prevent, or cure any condition imaginable. I contend they probably make up conditions just to scare their potential customers into becoming their customers.

Lesson learned: If you want to get people to come to your program, give them ridiculous names, as well. Then people might go by accident, expecting something completely different, and realize that whatever they accidentally attended is worth their time. Either way, they'd probably still be disappointed.

Choose Ian`s Adventure

I have amassed quite the library in my house and need a little guidance about what book to read next. Help me out by voting in the poll on the right column (For those reading this RSS style, go to the website to vote).

Vote or die.

Fresh milk

When walking through downtown Guayaquil, one might think they are in any large Latin American city.

You have the big government buildings, museums, large markets, crosswalks, clean parks.

You might actually start thinking that you are in a more developed country.

Then you turn a corner and see a guy walking two goats through the city center.

But he`s not just walking the goats to give them exercise. He is an entreprenuer.

You see, in one hand he carries the goats` leash. In the other, he has a sleeve of shot glasses.

He stopped in front of a store, put the cups under the goat`s udder, and poured a glass of milk. Then, he walked toward the store and sold the fresh goat milk to the shopkeeper.

And then he continued on his way.

I was in a cab when I saw this scene play out, so I wasn`t able to ask the vendor follow-up questions or order my own glass. Plus, I was in Guayaquil, so I didn`t have my camera handy. But you can imagine the outstanding ridiculousness of the moment.

School`s out for summer?

On the first day of school in the States, I guarantee that the majority of students could tell you when the school year ends. (or give a pretty accurate guess within two days)

In Ecuador it´s a different story.

When I left for my two-week vacation, I asked people in town when classes end.

``January or February``

Now keep in mind, I asked this is at the end of December.

So I came back from my vacation in the first days of January and saw kids in the street in the middle of the day. I wondered why the kids weren`t in school if school didn`t end until some time near the end of the month.

Well, it turns out that classes are already over. The kids are just finishing up their final exams.

In some high schools, they actually finished classes before the new year.

But I can`t really blame the kids on this one. I think the education system is at fault.

I don`t know how far in advance they plan the school year or how much notice they give to the kids. Two days before records day, the kids don`t know that they have the day off.

I`m not complaining about this. It was just very funny to come back from my trip and expect to have another month to work with my students only to find out that they are done with classes until April.

Blog back from vacation

In Ecuador, they don`t celebrate new years. They celebrate the old year.

In fact, they don`t even call it año nuevo. Instead, they go with año viejo (literally ``old year``).

They burn relics from the old year as soon as the clock strikes midnight. I wasn`t here for it, but everybody says that it is pretty ridiculous.

That`s an aside.

---

Hearyoni has retured reenergized and readjusted from its vacation.

I apologize that all visitors to my blog have had to look at dengue-suffering Ian for the last three weeks. That is one of the worst Ians.

A combination of a vacation, limited internet access, time with my family, trying to readjust to being in Ecuador, and mango in my computer have prevented me from updating.

Until now.

So where have I been?

Well, after eight months at my site, I finally took my first vacation days and met my family in Costa Rica. It was awesome. We had a great time, and I should probably provide a more thorough recap of the trip but the mango in my computer has put that machine temporarily out of service. (Lesson learned: don`t eat mango by your computer)

Since I have to pay for all my computer time now, I don`t want to use all that time for an all-out vacation recap. Suffice it to say, it was a great time in Costa Rica.

---

So there is an island off the Ecuadorian coast called Isla Costa Rica. It is a very small island with a lot of fishing industry.

When I told some of the kids here that I spent two weeks in Costa Rica, they wondered why someone would go to Costa Rica for two weeks. I then explained that I was in a different Costa Rica, and that there are several reasons to go to the country Costa Rica.

I got back on Sunday night and hit the ground running this week. It has been a very productive week. The kids have been working hard on the next newspaper edition, and I have spent most of the week coordinating their activities.

I promise to be back on the blog soon.

A januca to remember

On the first night of januca, I had planned a holiday party to share the tradition with people in my town. Unfortunately, I had to let all my friends know that instead of a januca party, I would be having dengue.

In this picture, dengue is winning.



But in the course of the next eight days, I made quite the recovery. So much so that I was frying latkes for the eighth night.

You think that's bad

"I've seen this. I've done this. You don't want this."

-Zohan Dvir

In the U.S., the mildly obscure but extremely common sickness that most people can relate to would be chicken pox.

Everybody has an experience with those little red dots, unless you were born in the 90s and received the vaccine. Although most of us were too young to really remember our chicken pox, it is something that most of us have suffered through.

In my town, people don't get chicken pox.

Instead, the semi-obscure, fully miserable disease that nearly everyone can relate to is dengue fever. (After last week's bout ... "I can relate")

Now, I would only compare dengue fever to chicken box in its commonality — nothing else!

Dengue fever is a tropical, mosquito-transmitted illness that has also been referred to as Broken Back Disease. I don't really like that nomenclature because it puts too much emphasis on one symptom — you get the notion that a chiropractor could help you with dengue.

That name disrespects the disease and its other symptoms. And you don't want to disrespect dengue. It can hurt you a lot of ways.

• Pounding headaches
• Paralyzing back pains
• Rusty joints
• Really, really, really high fever
• Chills
• Fainting
• Nausea
• Diarrhea
• Sore throat
• Rash

And this doesn't include the most irritating and often overlooked symptom: It makes everything you eat taste like chalk. And if something already tastes bad (like a rehydration solution), it will taste that much worse.

Oh, and there is no medicine that can cure dengue.

You can't do anything except take whatever punishment the disease decides to inflict upon you. And it lasts for at least a week — sometimes more.

So when you mention dengue to someone in town, they exhale and make a face that says "I feel really, really bad for that person. I know exactly what they are going through, and I do not envy them at all."

---

Last Monday night, my body felt like it was about to break down. The back pains and aching legs were followed by sleeplessness, lightheadedness, and a low-grade fever. At one point, I woke up on my bathroom floor. The next day, I rested most of the day and the symptoms weren't that bad. I didn't really think this was some sort of tropical disease. I pinned it on a combination of exhaustion, malaria medicine, and not eating enough on Monday.

But then I had another miserable night: my back felt as if it had been run over by a tractor and I cycled between baking-like-a-toasted-cheeser and shivering.

The following day, I felt fresh (I have no idea how that could happen because I slept all of seven minutes the night before, but it did). Feeling fine and with a really low fever, I thought I could maybe get some work done.

Mistake.

If there is one thing you do not want to do when you have dengue is challenge dengue. Best advice: submission.

Luckily, I realized my mistake early on and went right back to bed. By the third day, the fever was still there. My friend, a recent dengue survivor, said that I should call the Peace Corps med staff and explain my symptoms. (For the record, on the second day of my symptoms, she was convinced I had dengue)

So I did that. And the blood test looked like a probable case of dengue.

Continue submission.

Now let me explain what I mean by submission. You lie down on your bed. You can't really move because it hurts. If you overcome the sore joints and the pain that it takes to move, you can't really stand up because you'll probably faint. And did I say you have to keep hydrating and nourishing yourself while thinking that any food that goes into your body has a very good chance leaving your body through that same orifice.

In fact, when the medical staff first explained dengue to us during training they said that for ten days you will feel like you want to die, except that you won't. Thanks for the reassurance.

My friend who recently got over the disease described it as "roadkill."

Both are very accurate.

Those are the fact. Do you want to know what it's like to feel like you want to die?

Well, it sucks. And time passes really slowly.

It really makes you appreciate how great it is to have your health. Unfortunately, we only realize this when we are put in such dreadful states. But let me tell you something: be thankful you haven't gone through dengue.

To pass the time, I arrived at a mental state in which I tried to separate my mental being from the physical being. That way, I didn't have to focus on the anguish my body was in. It worked pretty well.

The other thing that helped me pass the time was being delirious. I knew I was being delirious because I would think about things and then say to myself "Ian, you're not thinking clearly." I planned on writing a journal to keep track of my dengue delusions. Then it hurt too much to write, so I had to scrap those plans. I'm sorry you all missed out on Delirious Ian. He's pretty entertaining. And blame it on dengue that you don't have his ramblings.

So what does it take to get over dengue? I've boiled it down to two things: patience and acceptance.

You wake up in the morning and know that all day long you will be in pain. Then you try to sleep at night and are in pain again. Of course, you've also realized that you can't do anything to make it better or go faster.

But eventually, it gets better. One night, your fever feels like it can't get any higher. Then the next morning, you head to the doctor for a blood test and the fever goes away. Congratulations, you are over the hump.

My family likes to use a phrase to describe difficult situations, be it taking a shit in the woods, being stuck out in the wilderness, a tough project for school or work:

"It builds character." (Or for those who speak in Latin tongue "construir carácter")

It's difficult to measure how you have changed. All you know is that you are better prepared to face other situations.

Dengue is definitely a character-building episode — one that I hope you never get to experience.

And I'm doing everything I can to make sure I don't get it again. They say the second round of dengue is worse than the first.

Thank you very much to everybody who posted a comment on the previous post or passed his or her messages through my family. I have been bedridden for nearly a week, but my family read them to me over the phone. It means a lot to have that kind of support group helping me through this character-building experience.

Ian has dengue fever.

I have dengue fever. It sucks. But I am recovering and will be back soon to blog about it.

Great fruit name

There are two kinds of guaba fruit that are common by me.

One of them is called vine guaba because the pits and fruit grow in a something that looks like a vine.

The other kind is called machete.

While the fruit is difficult to open, the name derives from its shape rather than the tool needed to open it.

It is a pretty decent fruit. The edible portion is gummy, and the pit looks like a cockroach.

A head scratcher

No, I don't have lice. Well, not yet at least.

Many times in Ecuadorian society, I have found myself speechless in response to certain actions or comments.

I had one of those yesterday in my living room.

I had some of the kids from the newspaper over to my house to celebrate the launch of their second edition.

By "celebrate the launch," I also mean "fold" because our newspapers don't come pre-folded. Part of the festivities involved baking oatmeal raising cookies and the other part involved folding 1500 copies of the newspaper. But since the folding takes more than the half hour it takes to make the cookies, one must provide some snacks throughout the afternoon.

I got them some plums and chocolate-covered bananas. They were delicious. Then, they finished eating and faced the question: what should I do with my garbage?

(Prepare to scratch your head)

There are a few options they could have opted for here.

• One would have been taking their waste and putting in the garbage bag in my kitchen.
• Another could have been throwing the pits into my neighbor's chicken yard.
• Another would have been to put the organic waste in the compost pile.
• Another would have been wrapping the garbage in a some newspaper paper and lighting it on fire.
• One more would be to take the pits and sticks and throw them on my floor.

There are probably a few other things they could have done with their waste, but these are the primary options that I can think of.

What do you think they chose to do?

Well, if you chose "turn my living room into a landfill," then you should get some sort of prize.

They just decided to drop their waste on my floor, which meant that the neighborhood ants and cockroaches were attracted by the fresh food and made for a horrible situation.

(Scratch your head and think)

AREvista (Segunda Ediciòn)

So when the kids made their first newspaper last month, they didn`t really understand what it would take to put together a monthly newsletter.

A lot of people even doubted that they could turn around and put together a new edition within a month.

Well they did.

You can find the next edition of the newspaper by clicking here.

The Interns

In Ecuador, high school seniors have to complete an internship to graduate. They do it to get a real-life experience.

Last week, two interns showed up in our office with 520 hours of service to complete.

In my time at the municipality, I have seen a few of these interns come and go. And the majority of their work has been, how do I say this correctly, the bitch work that the people in the offices have to get done but don't want to do. They have to organize filing cabinets, staple receipts, clean cabinets, etc.

But as soon as I saw the youth in my office, my mind flashed to a Seinfeld episode.

(Kramer just finished explaining an idea for a restaurant above the Chrysler Building)
Kramer: Of course it's a good idea. I conceived this whole project two years ago
....
Kramer: You see, I come up with these things. I know they're gold, but nothing happens. Do you know why?
....
Kramer: No time. It's all these menial tasks. Laundry, grocery shopping, coming in here and talking to you. Do you have any idea how much time I waste in this apartment?
Jerry: I could ballpark it.
(Elaine enters)
Kramer: Here you go. Now, she comes in. My whole day is shot.

Now, we just have to shift the scene from Kramer's world into my world in Ecuador (both ridiculous worlds, just in different ways). There are so many projects that I want to get started or maintain, but there is so little time (only 24 hours in the day, and I have to spend part of that time eating fruit).

How can I possibly get all that I want to get accomplished if I only have 24 hours in the day?

Simply put, I can't.

Enter the two interns.

Hi, this is Darren from Mr. Kramer's offices. Mr. Kramer would like to schedule a lunch with you at Monk's Coffee Shop.

Just like NYU was enthusiastic about its kids getting some real-world experience in the case of Darren at Kramerica Industries, the local high school has similarly high hopes. So they have placed two students in my office.

OK, so Señor Robinson won't be using the interns to schedule his almuerzos, but they can get some great experience in some of our other projects.

In one week in our office, they have written a few articles for the newspaper, assisted with the design, learned the importance of saving your documents (especially when there is ever-present risk of power blackouts), and developed sales experience.

Next week, I see them helping launch a recycling program, assisting in newspaper distribution, and working in the nursery.

I don't foresee the interns doing the glamorous work that Darren did at Kramerica, like laundry, mending chicken wire, or having high tea with a Señor Newman. But I still see this as a productive experience for them.

Only about 950 hours of cumulative intern time left...

A Traditional Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving just isn't what it used to be: Lions football, shopping, drinking, movies, family.

That is not what the holiday is about.

In my understanding of Thanksgiving, the pilgrims killed turkeys and cooked pumpkin pie with the native Americans at Plymouth Rock as a goodwill gesture, a cultural exchange.

So in my first Thanksgiving outside of the States, I decided to hearken back to the holiday's roots. I could have gone up to Quito and eaten a traditional Thanksgiving, with the Lions losing in the background, and a movie in the afternoon. But, as I said, I wanted an even more traditional Thanksgiving.

So ... seventeen volunteers from my training group converged on a small jungle town south of Macas for a campo Thanksgiving.

My friend's original plan was to raise turkeys himself and then kill them. But he didn't quite plan far enough ahead. Fortunately, his neighbor had turkeys. Unfortunately, I didn't get into town in time for the slaughter. Rumor has it that it was what you would expect. There was no certified shokhet in town, so I did not partake in the turkey consumption.

But seeing as I don't really come from a big turkey-eating family, I didn't really feel left out. You see, my mom is a vegetarian and the rest of my family was never really into turkey. So instead of an actual turkey on Thanksgiving, we eat pizza in the shape of a turkey. I was going to make this for my friends but realized the ridiculous quantity of food that was going to be served and decided that pizza can wait.

I rolled into town at 5:45 AM on Thursday and almost immediately started to help in the kitchen. Special thanks to: my mom for shipping me a pie crust and pie filling and Ecuadorian Customs for not giving me a hard time.

Throughout the morning, we continued cooking as volunteers slowly filtered into town. By noon, the entire crew had amassed, and we headed off to a tourist complex for the meal. There was still quite a bit of prep work to be done, so the afternoon was passed by the grill. By about 5:00 PM everything was ready. I could describe it or just show you the images.



And in the spirit of the first Thanksgiving, we shared the event with some Ecuadorians in the cultural exchange that Peace Corps promotes. It was a great opportunity to let them participate in one of our country's great traditions: the food coma.

We went around the table, explaining what we were thankful for on this Thanksgiving. The common theme was being thankful for the opportunity and experience that we have and that we should think about this every day, not just on Thanksgiving. People were also thankful for their families (Peace Corps and actual).

By about 8:00, I was out.

The next day, we visited a Shuar community near the town. The Shuar are an indiginous group that lives in the Ecuadorian jungle. You might have heard of them from head-shrinking fame. After taking a stroll through the woods with some members from the tribe, we sat down to a traditional Shuar lunch — chicha (some type of fermented beverage that is very common in the sierra and jungle), meat-of-what-used-to-be-a-furry-animal, yucca, and tea.

Then after lunch, some of the kids from the community put on a little dance number. It felt uncomfortably touristy and Peace Corps volunteers don't really like to feel that touristy.



But whatever.

It was a Thanksgiving story with Native Americans — just like at Plymouth Rock.

After another day of hanging out in the jungle, I hauled overnight back to my site to start my traditional post-Thanksgiving diet of six mangos per day.

Please aim away

Is it too much to ask that I can walk down the street without getting peed on?

All I want to do is be able to pass through town without the risk of someone urinating on me.

But around here, apparently, that is too much to ask.

Like most places in the developing world, the sewage system in my town isn't always reliable. Sometimes there is no water. Sometimes you can't find a reliable public toilet.

So if you have to go and you don't have anywhere to go, you should just cozy up to a wall, out of sight, and write your name.

That would make sense, right?

That's not the way kids are taught in my town.

Two days ago, I was walking down the main street in town. I looked to my left and saw a kid, with his pants down, aiming toward the street. I looked behind the child and saw that his mom was holding her son in place so that he pees into the street

She was helping him aim and giving him guidance on where he should point his stream. Unfortunately, that stream was on my intended walking path. I got out of the way, but this isn't the first time I have come across such a situation.

I shouldn't have to watch out for people peeing in the streets or on the sidewalks.

I don't exactly know the specific health risks of living in an open-air septic pit, but they do exist. I just know that there are no public health benefits to having urine in the street.

That is why I have decided to start the "Aim Away" campaign in which we will teach parents and youth the benefits of pointing away from the street.

Even though the kids are committing the act, the mentality that it is acceptable to pee in the middle of the street starts with the parents. That is why we will hold workshops, some that might even last several days, to show people how and where to pee.

I understand the convenience of peeing in public. What I don't understand is why they teach their kids to do it in the middle of the street when it takes three seconds to turn around, go to the wall, and do it there. And I guarantee they have three seconds to spare because, in this society, someone is considered on time even if they are half an hour late.

Really, all I want is to be able to walk down the street without having to worry about a urine stream or splash getting on my pants or shoes.

---

Oh, and Happy Thanksgiving.

Se llama kugel

As I have mentioned in my previous posts, I have high expectations for the world of kugel in global development.

Here is my first bit of proof.

Taking my example and recipe, one of my friends in town made her first kugel.

It was based on the pecan noodle kugel with a banana twist. It had received rave reviews at the previous three shabbat dinners at my home and the locals wanted to try their hand at the kugel craft.

I did not know when she planned on making the kugel. All I know is that she was planning on making one. So I walk into her house and her three-year-old son is eating kugel at the kitchen table.

Ian: Hola Pierro.
Pierro: Hola Ian.
Ian: What are you eating?
Pierro: Se llama kugel. (It's called kugel)

Top six greatest moments of my life, being taught by an Ecuadorian toddler how to pronounce kugel.

Two great kugel-related posts in three days.

Well, aren't you lucky?

Yes, you are.

I doubt that it will be three in four days. But if the kugel revolution takes off as planned ... you might just get your wish.

How to connect a canoe to a truck

Well, if you think that you knew how to secure a canoe to a truck, let me tell you another way to do it.

A much faster way to do it.

Step 1: Using a short rope, tie one end of the canoe to a stick wedged between the cab and the bed (loop, swoop, and pull method works best)

Step 2: Because the canoe is so long, you won't be able to close the lift gate So just let it hang.

Step 3: Now comes the most important part. You are going to need to put some weight on the canoe so it doesn't move around. Look for the heaviest person in your party and place them ``securely`` at the front end of the canoe and have him/her stand in the bow of the boat.

Step 4: Drive, preferably on bumpy, rut-filled roads or the Panamerican Hwy.

Step 5: Pray.

It's only four steps.

So easy.