Thursday, May 18, 2006

My First Presser

After a litle over week in Israel, Ian faced the media today for the first time. And he was ready to answer the tough questions.
Here is a transcribed copy off the press conference from earlier today.

Opening statement: Wow, I can't beleive it has been a week. In some ways, it has felt like I have been here a month. In other ways, just a few days. But nothing has felt like a week. In every way, I am having a great time.
Let me give you a brief update on my current status. Then I will answer your questions. Right now I am holding down three volunteer jobs — two at the Society for the Protection of Nature in Israel and another as a sportwriter for the Jerusalem Post. I live in the Nachlaot neighborhood in Jerusalem, great location. I am still working on what I will do the second half of my summer in Israel but when I know about it, you guys will be the first to hear.
Now I would like to open the floor to questions.

Ian: Ah yes, the blog-addicted Jewish mother in the front row.

Blog-addicted Jewish mother: What is in your refrigerator?

Ian: Good question. I just got back from the Shuk (open-air marker), so the contents might be a little skewed. Currently, I have a crate of apricots, half a crate of strawberries, four yogurts, babaganous, hummus, and an empty plastic bag. Before I went to the market, I only had the plastic bag and strawberries (that has been the standard condition of my fridge).

Blog-addicted Jewish mother's sister: Yes, I have a follow up to that one. Do you cook at all or just go out to eat . . . like Papa would?

Ian: Well, as you can see on the food group competition to the right, I am paying homage to Papa and go out to eat quite a bit. I ate my first meal in my room two days ago (pita bread with peanut butter, three nectarines, and a liter of water).
If you look at the shelving unit in my room with all of the cooking supplies, you will notice that it has gone untouched since I arrived. I plan on keeping things that way.
I would eat in more often if the food choices outside weren't so good.

Blog-addicted Jewish mother: Yes, I have a follow up to that. Looking at the food race, where is the ever-popular roly-poly rugelach?

Ian: The rugelach is a type of food that gets eaten in bunches and can also get nibbled on. How would I count the rugelach? Would I tally one for every one I eat? Every 10 I eat? Every occasion that I eat rugelach at? Each of these methods has its faults and wouldn't give a fair representation.
When I first started the race, I only planned on including foods that would make up a meal, which would've excluded Ice "Cuppy" Coffee (the Inuit cousin of my favorite Dunkin' Donuts Race character).
Because of the inclusion of Mr. Coffee into the competition, I will keep track of how many times and total amount of rugelach I eat. I may add the rugelach down the line or eliminate the coffee.

Yeshiva (U) Bukher: Best interaction with a native Israeli?

Ian: Good question. Until now, the best interactin with native Israelis (by best I mean hilarious) was the taxi cab ride in Holon with the older couple in the front seat that didn't know where I was trying to get to but agreed to drive me there, nonetheless. Each of them seemed to have different opinions as to where the arena was, and neither of them were correct. In the end, I racked up a bill of 24 shekels and the arena was only four blocks from where the cab picked me up.

Blog-addicted Jewish mother's sister: How are the young ladies in Israel?

Ian: In a little more than a week in Israel, I have found the young ladies in Israel to be very nice. They are willing to give directions to a lost American, but I haven't found any candidates for a long-term relationship (something someone like an aunt would want to know), yet.

Programming: The franklin umpiring squad didn't show up at the little league diamond yesterday (by now, it was two days ago). How would you ensure that this doesn't happen in the future -- if you were in charge?

Ian: From what I understand, the Franklin baseball umpiring system has struggled since the beginning of the year. They refused to rehire one of their most dedicated and , in my opinion, best umps. This just goes to show you that they are not doing all that they can to put out the best product that they can.
If I were in charge, I would institute a program where the umpire would call the coach the night before the game, or someone that the Umpire Director delegates would call the ump the night before the game to remind them.

Movie reference critic: What are the biggest challenges you face each day? Do you see yourself overcoming these challenges? What strategies are in place to deal with the situation?

Ian: Not only will these press conferences inform the public about my travels, but they will also help my observe the various aspects of my life in Israel and think of how to address them.
First (well, now actually second now), I would like to thank you for this great question. Until now the biggest issue that I have faced is that everybody knows English. While that might sound like a good thing, one of the reasons that I am here is to improve my Hebrew. I have now spent six years in school learning the language and I want to put it to practical use. Everytime I try to start a conversation in Hebrew, the Sabra (native Israeli) will change the language to English in mid-conversation, not the best way to improve one's Hebrew.
I plan on facing this challenge head on. I wiill be persistant and insistent on using Hebrew in conversations.When I volunteer, I try as hard as I can to speak Hebrew (my Hebrew gardening vocabulary might be larger than my English gardening vocabulary).

Troubleshooting: Two questions. What is the most expensive item you've bought thus far?

Ian: That is a great question. Aside from taxis, the most expensive item that I have bought so far is the shnitzel sandwich that cost me a shade under 30 sheks (about $7).

Troubleshooting: Number two: Which new foods have you tried? Explain.

Ian: While it might seem ridiculous, I never purchased a coffee dring before going to Israel. I have bought three ice coffees in the last two days. I see myself developing an unhealthy addiction. I am aleady googling the ICA.

Cultural Development: Ian, have you been to any museums yet?

Ian: As you know (or will know after finishing this sentence), another goal of my summer in Israel is to see some of the sites and museums that I haven't seen yet. I started off my tour of the museums with a stop at the Armenian Museum in Old City. It was worth the three shekel student fee but if they wanted to maintain a top-notch museum, they might want to think about raising rates so they can make changes that account for major political developments (it's now called the Republic of Armenia).


Things that I did learn: Armenia was the first country to adopt Christianity as the official religion. According to the map of the Armenian genocide, the Armenian genocide was the first genocide of the 20th century.

Guest Services: The Tigers are the best team in baseball. They have not lost since you got to Israel. Thoughts?

Ian: If the Tigers do not lose a game for the next three months, it would force me to do some deep thinking about whether I want to return home. Anyway, I love my Tigers. One Tiger note that I have to reconsider is the answer to the question "Who's your Tiger?" After a recent domestic violence charge aggainst 32-year old Dmitri Young by a 21-year old girlfriend, I will now answer the question with "Placido Polanco." On a not-so positive note, the Pistons are 0-3 since I left. I have done some thinking recently with the Tigers at the top of the league, which Detroit team would I most want to win a championship. It took me three seconds to answer "MY TIGERS!!"

That will be all for this press conference. Please continue sending your questions and I will hold another one in a few days.

6 comments:

Ari said...

best. blog. ever.

Anonymous said...

have you ever thought of doing stand up comedy, if not maybe take this writing gig a little more seriously. (pun intended) You are very informative , yet very hiarious. Laugh out loud kind.

Anonymous said...

In order to fit into the "Press Conference" format,this will be phrased as a question which will be followed by my own lengthy dissertation:

Have you had the opportunity to "dine" at Rachmo or Steakiyat Chatzot? I sense that the answer is no because their stuff is not on your score card. They are both in the shuk and close to your house.

At Steakiyat Chatzot go for the mxed grill if you are man enough. If not, just order the grilled meat of your choice and don't forget the chips!

At Rachmo you will have a lot of choices. Avi likes the rice and beans (orez im shuit) and just for a new exprience I suggest an all time Kurdish favorit called Kubbeh. The place is really cheap so if you don't like the Kubbeh you can follow it with Rachmo's hummus which, according to Avi, is the best in the land.

Enjoy and let me know the "score".

Anonymous said...

First question: Any trips planned? specifically towards the nothern region of the country. great area.

Second question: Any more interaction with people from the old coutry? Specifically those we know or may have attended a class or two with.

Thank you for your time.

Anonymous said...

Great post. Have you thought of going to any non-JPost sporting events…possibly Maccabi Tel-Aviv, I hear they are plying in Herziliya on Tuesday? You're making me ache for the summer with these thoughts and smells of Israel. Keep up the good work.

-THE Boy

Rubes said...

i believe that the pistons are 0-3 since a certain family left for israel as well... now that they are back, we'll see whether it is you or them who have more to do with the lackluster basketball played by the 'stons